Ai no Matsuri
by Mirrored Takuni
Summary: Matsuri has a secret that only Gaara knows. One that darkens her past. Gaara's kind words give her hope, but will her secret strenghten there bond, or end up tearing them apart? better then it sounds.


This is my GaaMatsu fanfic and proof that no matter what I'm writing it always turns out sounding like a mystery/sci-fi/fantisy story. However, my friends always seem to like my stories and say there envious of my style. I don't know why though. Long story short, they told me to put it up so I did.

Matsuri has a secret that Gaara only knows. One that darkens Matsuri's past. A secret that could be costly, perhaps even dangerous if someone else finds out. Gaara's kind words give her hope, but will her secret straighten their bond or end up tearing them apart? What will happen when someone discovers what she's hiding?

_Mirrored Takuni asks that you please read even if you think the description sucks. She admits she can't do them very well, but the story is much better. _

_Mirrored Takuni. _

Ever had a secret you couldn't tell anyone about? Ever wake up only to find your whole world change over night? Ever look in the mirror and know what you had to do? I have. I've lived the lie, walked the new path, and followed the reflection's orders. It's gotten me into many a mess, and if I were to look back now, I wouldn't even see the same past.

To tell my story in all its truth all its truth, is to share many secrets that have been hidden from all around me. To tell my story is to reveal a hell only witnessed by few, even in this world of war and death. Though it's hard for those who have not witnessed such horrors to grasp, I tell all and leave out no detail. That's the least I can do for all the ones I couldn't save in the end.

Here, in this abyss of a land, my heart and mind have found no refuge from the pain of worry. I hide here unseen by blind eyes; my heart so filled with sadness it feels numb. My eyes dry, not from the desert air, but from too many tears cried. Back now, at the year of growth, I hope for new light, but still I lie waiting, consumed by darkness and a cold chill that even the desert sun cannot shake. For what I did still eclipses my mind today. Even so long after hell came to me, it still lingers as a thought of light through blood and tears.

I sat alone on a cliff over looking the desert's drifting sands, and its dunes, which had become the colors of fire from the nearly set sun. No tears fell from my eyes, though I felt they should. My heart felt as a cold, metal weight in my chest and my chin lay heavily on the knees pressed tight to it with week arm. My skin felt numb and my thoughts silent. I wished all to end. I wanted it all to just disappear. The sunset, the sand, the peaceful sound of silence, it all made me so sick. How could things be so peaceful and serene? I felt my life was ending! I didn't wand the world to be so cheerful when I was so sad, but little did I know, as I sat wishing for the end, silent footsteps approached carrying a new beginning.

"I see you found my old spot," a voice said from behind me. I knew the voice, and though it cut the silence like a hot kunai, I was not startled. I sat, as silent as the sand beneath me, and as effected by his words as the deaf. I stayed, eyes fixed, as if frozen in stone. No expression played on my face, but still he could tell I was sad. He was, after all, the only one who knew. Knew what was bothering me, plaguing my mind to the point of such defeat. He knew why my world was ending and what I needed to hear. He also knew he was the only one I'd hear it from.

"This place…" He began, "It holds many memories for me. I used to come here to think, to try and understand why thing were the way they were. This is the place I come to rid of sad, horrible memories as well, but now it's called to you. It sees you're in need of its help."

"I'm sorry…" I said, unable to say anymore.

"This place wants you to forgive yourself and move on. It doesn't want you to be sad or angry at yourself for something you had no control over." He said, looking off into the setting sun, "Back then, this place was all that cared about me, but that's not the case for you. I care. I don't want you to be sad or blame yourself either. I want you to forgive, not fall into the same dark place that once contained me. I want to see you smile again."

I felt a tear trail down my face. It was not, however, of the tears I felt should fall. Instead, it was a tear that made my heart feel lighter and a small, soft smile appear on my hidden lips. His words made me happy. They, somehow, made the entire world make sense, even if only for that moment. He was there and he cared enough to want me to smile again. Something he rarely did himself. That thought alone made me want to grant his wish, when he turned his head to look at me. He seemed saddened by the tear on my cheek, my smile hidden form his view. He turned away looking utterly defeated and apologized, his normally emotionless eyes filled with a hint of sadness.

"Don't be sad," I said, "I don't want you to be."

His head snapped back to see the smile on my face and a look of relief seemed to instantly rush over him. His face went back to its normality. An emotionless mask that hid his deeper feelings far from the harm others brought upon them, but I could still see the happiness flicker, if only for a split second, inside his empty, aqua eyes. It made my heart feel more alive as it skipped in my chest. The warmth was now retuning to me. He made my hell feel like a paradise only for angels, making me feel even more that I should thank him for all the things he's done for me, and show him he doesn't have to feel alone anymore either.

My arms, without even a moment's hesitation or forethought wrapped around his neck, hugging him tightly and causing him much surprise. He, though slightly startled and much more hesitant, returned the embrace I so bravely gave him, closing his eyes to the new feeling. Like me, he didn't want the feeling to end and held me tightly, trying to prevent it from stopping too soon, but soon loosened his grip.

I pulled away slightly, but never loosened my hug around him in fear of him leaving. I looked at him as his eyes met my own. a gentle smile stretched across his lips; it was one I had never seen before. It made no sense to me. He should be killing me, not smiling so sweetly, but I'm not one to let a chance such as that pass me by. So, I leaned in and softly kissed his pale, cool lips, which soon became warmer and lightly flushed by my kiss.

The kiss, despite his lack of experience, was one of the best I've ever received. It warmed me completely and brought back the feeling in my skin. The chill of before disappeared as my now quickened heartbeat pumped the heat through my veins. As if all of that wasn't enough, he returned the kiss, pressing his lips even closer to mine, his heart beating faster.

I had never known him to be like this, nor did I ever even think he could. His faster heart rate seemed so out of place. He was, after all, always so calm and collected before, or at least it seemed so. Now however, he was far from either. His body was tense, even more so then it normally would be, his face dampened by long awaited tears. Tears cried of joy, happiness, tears cried for a dream that was believed by him, to never be true.

Never in his life, did he believe he would know the feel of love's kiss. Nor did he believe I would be the one to show him the attraction to its luster, though secretly he wished I would. I was, after all, the only one who knew the real him. Even things he kept from his siblings, he talked with me about. I was one of the only people he ever held a conversation consisting of more than a sentence with. He trusted me with his secrets, just as I trusted him with mine, and even as the long kiss broke, he tried to take in every last sensation, never wanting to forget the first kiss he never thought he'd have.

"What are you doing?" He asked, his voice hiding his anxiety.

"I'm…trying to thank you." I said, blushing lightly. "I wanted you to know how you make me feel, you know. Loved."

"Loved…" he repeated, distantly. "You want me to feel loved?"

"Of course!" I said with a smile. "You are loved. Shouldn't you be able to feel that way?"

"I am?" he asked, unsure he understood me correctly.

"Well, I love you." I said. "That means you're loved in my book."

"You love me?" He asked, still sounding unsure.

"Yes, I do." I answered, my voice giving away my frustration with his constant questions. "Anymore questions?"

A much more noticeable smile crossed his now reddened face, as he shook his head. I smiled in return, my heart skipping at the very sight of his handsome smile, knowing it was just for me. Even though I always thought his smile would be wonderful, and it saddened me that he so often hid it from the world, I never could've imagined it being as amazing as it really was. Nor how it would soften his dark and sharply, harsh eyes, changing the entire look of his already highly attractive face, making it even more handsome. Though the smile was gentle, it shone so nobly across his lips, sweet and lovingly, as though proud to finally display itself upon his pale cheeks. It seemed to warm the chill that now hung in the desert air, causing us the realization that the sun had sunk below the ever shifting sands of Suna.

All comments, good and bad are welcome.

However, please nothing about the pairing...if you don't like it, don't read it.

Thank you!

With luv, Mirrored Takuni.


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